Saturday, February 4, 2012

Hi, I'm alive

January was a bust blog-wise.  I got me a Kindle Fire and I read a buncha books and then I just forgot how to form my own words.  There have been some things I've wanted to blog about but my brain melts just thinking about typing an entire paragraph.

PHEW!  Ok, now that I've gotten a paragraph out of the way, I think I can do this.

My January was spent being pregnant and hormonal, convinced I was going to miscarry, yet morbidly fascinated by the thought as well.
     Chances of a blog entry about that in the next few days/weeks: Highly Likely

The month was also spent dreading my birthday.  It's all been downhill for me since I turned 22.  I think I suffer from Chronic Quarter-Life Crisis.  Until I turn 38 and switch to Chronic Mid-Life Crisis.  And fuck, then I guess I'll switch back to Quarter-Life Crisis.
     Chances of a blog entry discussing the evils of goals and success: Very Highly Likely, because I've already written it, I just need to edit it to be 100% less emo.

I ignored my children every day for 5 days while reading The Hunger Games at the beginning of this month.  Goddam I love a good dystopia!  The series was a really easy read and I dug the commentary on government and power and the human animal, and the relationships were fun.  And Team Gale vs. Team Peeta better not become a thing because there was no Team Gale people, there just wasn't.  GAWD.
     Chances of a blog entry explaining my take on a lot of complaints I read online after I became obsessed and googled and read every HG forum:  Eh, probably not, unless I revisit the books in preparation for the movies which are going to be fantastic a month and a half from now!

I also have been reading the Bible to get some context on the batshit things I've been reading on Facebook, and to better understand the point of view of my Christian BFF.
     Chances of me telling you why this book infuriates me:  Likely, if I'm feeling ballsy or if I'm able to write it without being offensive to my friends.

My children will be in the Girl Scouts.  I previously had no interest in them until I found a video of a little girl trying to tell me why I should hate them, and instead she gave me every reason to love them.
     Chances of a picture blog of me in a tub of Thin Mints and Samoas:  Likely, though it's old news, it's still important news.  Picture pending on me finding money for overpriced but delicious round bites of ecstasy.

I saw a picture of Violet as a half-year old today and was enamored with her cute little fatty feet naked in the grass.  Eeee, I love them!  It reminded me of an incident earlier this year though, involving a summer road, bare feet and some dumbass overprotective helicopter mom retard asshole.  Bitch.
     Chances of a discussion on parenting and fear:  Very Likely.  Bitch.  (Now I'm just in the mood to say bitch a lot)

Lastly, adoption!  An online friend of mine adopted two little boys very recently and the pictures are killing me.  THEN, my BFF4evs told me like 2 days later that she has begun (began? started.) the adoption process.  COLOR ME EXCITED!!!
     Chances of a personal confession of why I was and probably still am a selfish butthole:  Well that's like every time I talk, but regarding this specific subject Fo Shizzle.

So yay, I blogged!  That's your February preview, if I can keep the head and the fingers good and lubed.  Yup.
    (Chances of me not touching on a single subject listed above and instead making no entries while I'm uh, off, hunting for proof that unicorns exist:  Possible.) (Bitch.)

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