I want to get myself back in the habit of multi-weekly typings but I have nothing of value to say, so here's a list that doesn't require any brainwaves to type up:
Someone breaking into my house while I'm pooping
Someone pulling up to me at a stop light and shooting me in the head
Driving next to a big rig and being smooshed under a
Dangling half of my arm over the bed when I'm laying down and someone or something randomly falling and breaking my arm back the wrong direction at the elbow
Being pantsed in public while wearing period underwear
A bus driver swerving to avoid a squirrel and subsequently rolling his bus through my living room
The steel collapsing at Costco while I'm bent over underneath it and beheading or bebodying me
Randomly tripping anywhere and breaking my lower leg bone so the sole of my foot is facing up
Bugs crawling into my crotch. Forever my greatest fear.
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