Tuesday, December 20, 2011

My children will look at all this Christmas shit whether they like it or not

The cool thing about having kids is I get to drag them to do all the things I loved doing as a kid and force them to like it too.

Every time we pass a Christmas light display, I yell out to Violet, LOOKVIOLETCHRISTMASLIGHTS!  It didn't take long before she was the one yelling WOOKCHRISTMASWIGHTSMOM!

Last night we went to my favoritest display on 34th Street and I died of excitement a few times.  It was Baltimoriffic with Boh and crabs everywhere, as expected.  Also crowded as balls, as expected.

Baltimore is a buncha drunks.

And shit-eaters.

Jeebus Bot v2.0

This is a mini-train garden under someone's porch!  OMG!

Another fun sight in Baltimore this holiday season was the Procession of the Santas.  I still have no idea what this was about, but we apparently were in the right place at the right time to see it and it just happened to simultaneously coincide with my longest orgasm ever.  Mmmm, men in suits.  No, the type of suit does not matter.


A new possible tradition for us this year was taking really shitty quality pictures apparently.  Here's the worst one yet!

Washingtion Monument FIREWORKS.  In DECEMBER.  AH!

On our schedule for the rest of this week are TRAIN GARDENS!  The two absolute best around are in Dundalk and Towson.  Towson's display is free if you can resist the food court pizza that you walk by to get to the trains, and Santa is right upstairs for a little lap-sitting if you so please.   Children are welcome to sit on his lap too.  Dundalk has a required $1 "donation" for entry (so very worth it though!), and you can stop in to check out the fire trucks while you're there too.  Last year Violet was really into "firewoowoos" and couldn't wait to sit in it.  Once we got there though, she changed her mind.  I like to think she was afraid the truck would transform and walk off to kick some Decepticon ass while she was in it.  But more likely she's just a chickenshit.

OH!  Must make cookies in the next 4 days also.  And wrap presents.  And buy presents to wrap.  Yeah, that's probably important to do.

Leela is not amused by Christmas shenanigans.

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