Tuesday, July 3, 2012

I bought Harvey his very first clothing item today.

How have I made it 32 weeks and I remain in denial that I'm going to have a new baby this year?

I at least feel pregnant now.  Things just started to hurt in the last 3 or 4 weeks.  Luckily the aches and pains still aren't as bad as they were with either girl.  I'm still able to squat without having to prop my vagina up with crutches to keep it from falling out.  I can roll over in bed in less than 5 minutes.  I can even sit on the floor for short periods of time and get up without assistance!

But still, somehow I've made it a month into the third trimester and it hasn't sunk in.  Er, actually it may have sunk in, TODAY, because I realized it's not ok that I'm not freaking out about all I have to do.  I haven't prepared my house at all.  I haven't figured out a sleeping situation for Number 3.  I haven't figured out where I'll store his clothes considering we only have two usable bedrooms and five people and their clothes to squeeze in those rooms.  I haven't figured out how I'm going to afford a wardrobe to hang.  Two hours ago I hadn't even bought him a single thing, but thanks to Target he is now the proud owner of a plain gray newborn sized hoodie for $6.  Hey Big Spender!

I guess during my Target trip I entered the "dream nesting" phase - I went there to get a new cabinet to reorganize my kitchen and all of a sudden it all hit me.  Holy fuck, I need shit organized.  I cannot stand clutter.  If I trip over one more toy or find one more stray cracker box on the floor or even see that pile of pots sitting on my stove because it has no other place, I might commit suicide.  If I can't get my junk drawer closed one more time, I might commit homocide.  If I so much as see half a goddam footprint on my freshly mopped floor, I swear to Allah I will suicide bomb the Earth!

Yeah, I'm a pretty intense dream nester.  Meanwhile, that cabinet is sitting out in the back seat of my van rather than being put together and filled with countertop clutter and then closed where I won't have constant anxiety attacks over it.  Hopefully the real nesting superhuman energy will kick in soon!

Perfect fit!  PS Don't judge me by my tie-dye.

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