Friday, August 19, 2011

It's happening!

Remember I was talking about how I suck and never follow through with blogging?  Well... I feel I'm slowly drifting towards Neverneverblog Land.  I blame part of that on the fact that I realized last week that my father and sister read this crap and now I feel all violated.  Like I realize this is a public blog and all, but I just assume that when I post something A) no one will actually read it, and B) that the few people who do read it don't actually know me as more than a bunch of words on a screen.  Good thing I didn't write anything embarassing or incriminating about either of them, like how I'm pretty sure one of them smokes the ganja.

Another reason I haven't been blogging is because I have a very specific idea for a Roll Model blog and I'm so ADD that every time I sit down to write I can't think about anything else but this hypothetical blog... and curtains and unicorns and zombies and Dora... but nothing else blog-related.  Unfortunately it involves me taking pictures of myself, and I just haven't lost enough weight yet to voluntarily post pictures of my fat flaps on the internets.

So until I get drunk enough or rich enough to get the whole world drunk enough to put their beer goggles on while viewing pictures of me, here's my latest random thought, brought to you by Pinterest.


You know what would be the most comfortable place to sleep ever?  Space.  The second most comfortable place?  Underwater.  Wearing one of those underwater breathing apparatus from Harry Potter.  OMG I die just thinking about it.  With all the warmth and weightlessness and no back pain and no boob squishing if I want to sleep stomach down.  Like being in a womb, but less gross.  I want this.  Ok?  You hear that inventors?  Make this happen for me.

P.S.  Before anyone says anything, it is nothing like a fucking water bed.  With water beds there's still gravity and blankets and sheets that get twisted when you roll over and pressure points and that nasty *sloshglosh* sound anytime you move.  Oh, and don't even get me started on sleeping in a water bed WITH someone.  Water beds?  Worst invention ever.  A "bed" inside water?  Genius.  When you go to test out the Water Chamber 3000 at Sleepys a few years from now, you just remember you have ME to thank.

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